Posted by KD Bosch on August 21, 2001 at 22:57:06:
I don't know why I am adding to this board... more misery added to misery and sadness. I suppose it is because at least you will understand. I lost my wife of 18 years to cancer a couple of weeks ago (July 30, 2001)... I have a 17 year old son and a 14 year old daughter. I smile and hug and say reassuring things when my daughter awakens me at 3:00am to tell me about her dreams.... always of her Mom dying again.
Like you, I find myself crying more often than at first... I feel like I must be indulging in selfishness, but I can't seem to stop. I'm only thankful that the bad ones are when I'm alone... for the most part.
I was also told that God has a plan for us... RIGHT... how do I explain that to my children?? When it makes NO sense to me. My wife was the kids Mom and their best friend... they liked her better than their school friends. I was the disciplinarian who was always trying to make sure they didn't make the same mistakes I did.
I'm sorry... I hoped I could say something to help you or that this would make me feel better. I hoped that this would bring a flash of wisdom or insight... all it is bringing is tears.
Post a Followup