Posted by Brandy Croteau on June 12, 2002 at 22:50:41:
In Reply to: Re: widow at 28 posted by Vee on June 12, 2002 at 16:12:59:
How have you coped with it. I feel so empty like it really hasn't happened or something. I have been keeping myself busy but when I am alone it haunts me. I notice that when I hear stories about my husband it helps because it makes me laugh, even for a second. I keep telling everyone that I want to hear stories and I don't want anyone EVER to feel that I don't want to hear. The Sheriff's Department that Steve worked for is putting together books for my children that are filled with pictures of Steve and stories about him witten by his co-workers. They also video taped the funeral and had a video made with pictures of Stev and music. They are keeping me a float. I have never been one to ask for help but I remember something my mother-in-law told me after my first child. She said "Don't be so proud. Accept help when it is offered." Obviously she had no idea how much that one comment of hers to me has made a difference to me especially in times like this. How have you helped you child deal with the death of their father. My daughter keeps asking me to watch the video of Steve. I can tell that I am getting past the numb satge because I was able to watch the video when it was first made right after Stwve was killed and now I can't watch it without crying. My daughter turns to me and says " Mommy you sick?" All I can say is "No baby, mommy is sad and misses daddy." It is strange all of the mixed emotions I am having. I wish that I understood the why. I can rationalize it but when I am alone and thinkg about holding Steve and kissing him I begin to cry again. Tahnks for listening.