Posted by Dedi on April 23, 2000 at 18:50:13:
In Reply to: When do you get better? posted by Connie on April 08, 2000 at 21:49:20:
Sometimes I wonder how long it really does take to get better. I can relate to how you feel. My husband, Joe died almost 4 years ago and some days are just as hard now as they've ever been. We were married 5 years. I am 37 now and have 2 small boys. I was pregnant with the youngest one when Joe died. They are 3 1/2 and 7 now. You know you have to keep going for them. But sometimes it is still so hard. Joe was a very good person so it is so hard to understand why my boys have to go through life not knowing him.
I've gone to church also because when Joe was alive we always went to church. It is just is another reminder of him. It is difficult to try to sit through church and want to cry anyway and then when your children won't behave sometimes you can't help but cry. Then I get nothing out of church so I feel like why bother.
I also know the feeling of being lonely while you're with family and friends. It is especially hard on holidays like today. I spent the day with his family. We are still close to his family because of the children. I don't have any family where we live. His family is good to us but sometimes it's so painful to be with them.