Posted by Vanessa on August 22, 2002 at 02:13:49:
In Reply to: Tragedy at 27 posted by Jessica on August 01, 2002 at 09:06:00:
Dear jessica, I am really sorry for your lost, and as like others I know what the pain feels like. I found out in 2000 I was 2 weeks pregnant with my 1st child, only 19 but still I was excited. I was just going to call my grandad, cos he always wanted to be a great grandad father, but the phone bet me too it. My mum was saying "you must come now, grandad is not gonna survive the day". The shock and very stunned I was, still I rushed where I live is in hamilton (NZ), and all my family live in Gisborne which is a 5 hour drive. I did it in 4 hours, going 120km, I arrived at the hospital to find him on all these tubes and uncounsious. the pain, hurt and heres me not been able to tell him. 20 mins later he died. Sometimes i wonder, "maybe he knew, and waited for me to arrive", as the tears came down my face I screamed out loud "grandad I'm pregnant, why now why???"..... none of my family knew, but were stunned but also could feel my hurt. It has been 2 yrs on the 30th June, and still the pain is there, I believe it will always be there. I have a song which I love listening too, its called ANGEl, by Celion Dion and R Kelly, A beautiful song which brings tears to my eyes.
Jessica, you will always feel the pain and hurt, but one thing, don't blame yourself, I know it must be hard, you will get stronger each day wether you know it or not. I am here for you even though I live in New Zealand, but my email is always open here for you if you need anything.
Take care, and god bless,
Vanessa