Posted by Avy on December 05, 2001 at 16:54:46:
2 Months ago I lost the most important person in my life. We were 17 days away from our wedding when he died very suddenly in a traffic accident. We had a lifetime of dreams ahead of us, which will now be un-realised.
I miss him so much, it's hard to put into words just how lost and lonely I feel right now. He was my best friend, my strength, my hope, my life.
I walk around our house and feel like an invader in someone else’s home, all the love has gone from what was our dream home and to be here alone seems wrong.
I can't drive his car or unpack his sports bag, I can’t move his shoes from the rack or his toothbrush from the bathroom and his shower gel is exactly where he left it. I feel paralysed.
People keep telling me that they can feel his presence or sense him around them and I can't, why not?
I miss him, need him, want him, love him. I don't know how to be with out him, don't want to be without him. I feel confused and lost, I’m in pain and the person I need most, the one who could always make things better is gone. How do you go on?