Posted by Marie on February 11, 2001 at 18:49:06:
In Reply to: Re: Lost My Dear Wife 10/29/00 posted by David on February 08, 2001 at 21:56:11:
David~
A friend of mine told me the very same thing just a few months ago....about how we have the capacity to love more than one person.
It took me a long time to realize that loving someone else, does NOT take away from the love I felt for my husband. I had such guilt over that. And then finally a friend made me realize that I didn't have to "give up" the love I felt for Tommy...in order to love another. He, like you, also spoke of the tremendous amount of love we feel for our children...but how we do not stop and wonder if we have enough to go around when we're expecting another. There is no GUILT because we know that we don't have to take away any of the love for the others to be able to love the new. It was silly to think my love for anyone else would be any different. Yes...we CAN love again.....AND still never take away from the ones we lost. Someone also once told me that wanting to find love again...and marry again after losing a spouse...doesn't show how much you didn't love them..but rather how much you DID! So much so...that you are wanting to do it again. None of us should feel any guilt in loving again. We are left here to continue our lives...I think it would be a disrespect to our loved ones...to stop living. I do hold fast to the thought that we will, one day, be together again though.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I know someone, besides myself, has found comfort in them.
Marie