Posted by Carolyn on December 15, 2001 at 19:46:32:
In Reply to: Needing some help posted by Kimberly on December 12, 2001 at 21:32:38:
Kimberly,
I lost my husband on Nov 1in a car accident. I am 34 and have a 2 girls, 1 & 3. I changed alot of things this year. I bought a fake prelighted tree, got packages wrapped at the store, and have tried to make my life a simple as possible so that I can focus on my girls. My husband and I collected ornaments from everywhere we visited, so decorating was a tearful walk down memory lane. I am spending Christmas at home with my girls, mom and my sister, instead of traveling. I have forced myself to get out of the house daily and attend a select few holiday events. Parties are definately not on my agenda. some days I am a complete wreck and other days I just seem to make it through..I am seeing a psychiatrist and a therapist - they have helped tremendously. I just started making so homemade presents to keep my mind busy so I don't think.As well I have linked up with two other young widows through mutual friends it has helped so much to talk to others. On our anniversary Nov 23 I had an awful day. I lit our unity candle, had a glass of wine, and tried through all of the pain to find some positives that have happened to others as a result of my husband's deathThen I went through my wedding album with my daughter. It was very healing. Don't spend the day at the cemetary - visit for a short time and leave something symbolic at the sight, better yet go somewhere that was special to both of you to help you feel more connected. Please try to spend time with people who support you. Every day is a huge hurdle but we are all stronger for it. Thinking of you - Carolyn