Posted by ana on June 02, 2001 at 09:22:22:
my husband went to work may 22ond just like always...he went on a job site and because of another mans impatience my husband of six years was killed. i lost a best friend and my children lost a good father. he was only 28 and im 25...we have two kids 5 and 2 months...and now im so lonely. i dont even like to be with other people. its not the same...he understood everything...he was my soul mate...he was my safe haven and now hes gone...who do i tell my secrets to? who do i joke with or play around with? i dont even feel like cooking, cleaning, working, when do i go back to work? when will i be normal? when will everybody quit asking me how im doing? no im not fine im angry! i really believe in God but i just cant make my brain stop with the 'whatifs' what if he could have stayed home? what if i would have made him late to work that morning WHAT IF? i cant even make myself cry...and my poor baby boy...he wont cry either...not even at the interment...he just said his eyes were sticky...my poor baby...is this going to pull us apart?how do i raise a good young man without my husband? ive never even seen a dead person before! and i definitly dont know anyone my age without a spouse(because of death)does anyone have any ideas? help me if you can...