Posted by C.D. on March 30, 2001 at 08:07:04:
It has been almost two and a half years since you left this earthly life and moved into the spendor of Heaven. I often wonder if you can see me and know what I am doing. If you can know the thoughts of my mind and know the feeling that I now have. I hope you do. If it were your choice, I know that you would. Heaven is real for you now but for me it is still a mystery.
I remember the first night that we met so many years ago. It was the beginning of a wonderful journey that lasted almost forty years. So many times, I have let my mind wander back over the years to the special times that we shared together. Our first kiss. Our first embrace. The first time that I told you that I loved you. The first time that you told me you loved me. The years that I spent in college and the years that you spent in nursing school. Sometines those weeks that we were apart seemed so long and those weekends that we were together seemed so short. My heart floods when I think of them now.
You were so faithful to me. You showed your love in so many ways. Your undying love and devotion for me was so real. The way that your lips felt when we kissed. The color of your lovely brown eyes. The smell of your hair. All these things are the things that I long for so very much. I would give everything that I have or ever hope to have for just one moment with you. But that is not to be.
So many times I have asked God why. Why, why, why He did not see it in His will for your healing here on earth. I want so much to know what tomorrow holds. It seems that my life is so empty now. I tremble at the thought of living the rest of my days without you. Sometimes I think that I have reached some level of acceptance and understanding but the lonely moments quickly wipe that away. So, I must move on without you. So many people have had to do the same thing but that does not make it any less of a pain and heartache.
I am so thankful for every moment that we spent together. I long to remember the good times and the times that we leaned on each other so much. Many of my friends have come to love me and pray for me. I know that you have much to do with that. I try so hard to be happy again. I know that the past is now gone and that I must move on. I know that you would not want me to withdraw from life. I need you so much.
Thank you for being everything in this world that I ever needed. Thank you for the thirty-four years that you were my wife. Thank you for every kiss and fond embrace. Thanks for every smile. Thanks for the twinkle in your eye. All of these things and many more, have given me so much to remember. Memories of you are so wonderful. I wear your ring around my neck every moment of the day. I feel that a part of you is with me when I do.
One day we will meet again on the shores of Heaven. One day I will see you and you and yes, embrace you again for all eternity. Until that day, I will do my best to keep on doing the things that I know that you would want me to do.
Until we meet again,
Post a Followup