Posted by julie on January 24, 2001 at 14:58:49:
In Reply to: Guilt and Grief posted by Jason on January 23, 2001 at 20:26:30:
Jason I am so sorry to learn of your grief, i do know about guilt and grief. You now have two little treasures as constant reminders of Julie, i say constant beacuase not a day will go by when you do not se Julie through them, but remember they are happy thoughts and memories, you both created gods gift, it will be a tough long road, please take all the help you can get. I know how dificult it is when the kids are sleeping an all your thoughts are your own. I share this with you. I lost the love of my life, mu husband, my best friend on 14/12/99 (he was born on 11/2/61) he died so suddenly of a massive heart attack brought on by a disease of the arteries which the hospital had still not found, despite a few tests, his brother died 21 days before him of a heart condition too, whilst his parents both have heart conditions, they still still failed to spot a genetic disorder. I too have two children, a daughter aged 6 and a son aged 2 (whom i have just came out of hospital with, he was rushed in with a chest complaint, thankfully he is getting better, although I have no faith left in that particular hospital). I do ry to keep busy all of the time I suppose its my way of coping and your right not controlling the real emotions of grief which is a huge roller coaster to get on. I too have not had that special sign from Derek, I still have not had that dream of him either, I too am a catholic and cannot understand why God will not allow this so I go to a spiritualist (never believed in them before) and the messages I get are very comforting indeed. I you need to talk Jason, I check on the Safe Haven rom time to time or you can email me. Thinking of you and your family, Julie (Scotland)